Fat chicks.

by Steph on January 14, 2009 · 28 comments

I want to discuss weight and judgment for a moment. If the only thing you have to rag on someone about is the fact that they’re overweight, then they’re probably a pretty awesome person in general, and you’re a douchebag for not noticing their awesomeness. If there are other things to rag on besides their weight, why not rag on those things instead of making yourself look like a shallow douchebag?

Frankly, unless their weight is causing you some kind of discomfort, it’s just none of your fucking business. If their fat isn’t slopping over into your seat on the plane, STFU. If their fat isn’t causing them to shift some of their workload to your inbox, STFU. If their fat isn’t impacting your life (other than you having to look at that oh-so-grotesque fat), STFU.

Yeah. There’s my two cents on the matter.

Signed,
A Fat Chick

Tagged as: ,

Like a country gas station after midnight, comments on this entry are closed.

{ 28 comments }

1
Vote -1 Vote +1Lindsey January 14, 2009 at 3:30 am

I just realized, as I read this, that most of my favorite people are fat. I don't know if the really thin ones are so obsessed with staying thin that they are boring as hell, or if being judged on your appearance constantly forces personality growth, (I know it did for me, I had the figure of a starving Ethiopian child, a nose with its own zip code, frizzy hair and braces when I was in high school, and it was commented on with disgust at least every other day, therefore I had to become funny and good at playing the character roles in theater.) I laugh until I cry with my overweight friends, and the super-toned buff size four ones from the gym make me force smiles and try not fall asleep as they chat endlessly about working out or their kids or working out or what they bought from the pottery barn catalogue.

2
Vote -1 Vote +1quirkyblogger January 14, 2009 at 4:17 am

People suck. Judging by appearances is ass. Some of the most rockin' people I know are big girls. 'Course some of them are skinny girls, too.

IDK. I was just feeling all pissy about people who write off perfectly awesome folks just because those folks are fatasses.

3
Vote -1 Vote +1WaltzInExile January 14, 2009 at 4:17 am

Dude. You are TOTALLY a ray of fucking sunshine. This made my day. And we're talking a day that started with a school delay for snow, and now there's a noon dismissal anyway.
Rude people are the ones who need to be ragged on. Raised by wolves much?

4
Vote -1 Vote +1quirkyblogger January 14, 2009 at 4:23 am

HEY! Where the hell have you been?!? I see no updates in my Reader. Whafuh? I MISS YOUUUUUUU.

Also? SUCK.TASTIC. about the snow. Goat BBs home all day? With shit weather? I feel for you, my friend.

5
Vote -1 Vote +1Eden January 14, 2009 at 5:19 am

I think people like to sling "fat" around as an insult b/c it's "okay." It's not like religious or racial epithets where one might be criticized for its use. "Oh but she really is fat so it's fine if I call her that." Fat bitch, fat cow, fat cunt… whatever. It's used as a throwaway word.

I wrote a letter to Entertainment Weekly years ago (and it was published) about their review of… I think it was Hairspray. Yes. Hairspray on Broadway. There were snide comments about the "combined weight" of the cast and lots of other jabs to the ribs equaling "look at the fat people — tee hee!" There was NOTHING about the production vale, the songs, the performances and I said so. I said that I came away from the review knowing the cast had fat people in it and not much more. Then I got a couple e-mails (my e-mail address was published) about how I must be fat. Why must I be fat? B/c I expect a reviewer to actually review?

Fat chicks can always lose weight. Douchebags will always be douchebags.

6
Vote -1 Vote +1Jaci January 14, 2009 at 5:33 am

I think Eden is right. "Fat" is an acceptable slur. Also? It's a word that always hurts women the deepest. Guys could care less if you call them fat–but girls will seriously CUT YOU.

7
Vote -1 Vote +1quirkyblogger January 14, 2009 at 8:21 am

I think it boils down to the idea that being fat is a choice where being black or Asian or gay isn't…what's funny is the only people who really believe that fat people are fatassing it on the couch all day while they surf the 'tubes or watch Oprah are people who've never been significantly overweight in their lives, IME.

For those of us who've been on both sides of the fat/skinny fence, we know better.

8
Vote -1 Vote +1quirkyblogger January 14, 2009 at 8:24 am

And it's also nearly the FIRST attack by women. IME, we love to talk about someone's size when we're trashing them. And not just fat chicks, but skinny chicks, too. I myself have been guilty of being all, "Oh, no, that skinny bitch did NOT just…"

I blame the media.

9
Vote -1 Vote +1Eden January 14, 2009 at 8:42 am

And I was just sitting on the sofa eating pop corn & watching "People's Court"

10
Vote -1 Vote +1matteroffactmom January 14, 2009 at 8:44 am

hoofah. i certainly hope my post about the Woman in the Office With the Giant Ass isn't what elicited this post… i know your world certainly doesn't revolve around me, but i just hope…
and i agree – it's 100% socially unacceptable to refer to someone as a "chink" or other racist term, but if you call someone fat, that's okay. i will admit to sometimes being judgmental when meeting someone for the first time who is obese. however, i had fat friends and i have skinny friends… and, as one of my fat chick friends says, "I may be fat, but you're ugly and I can diet."

11
Vote -1 Vote +1matteroffactmom January 14, 2009 at 8:44 am

hoofah. i certainly hope my post about the Woman in the Office With the Giant Ass isn't what elicited this post… i know your world certainly doesn't revolve around me, but i just hope…
and i agree – it's 100% socially unacceptable to refer to someone as a "chink" or other racist term, but if you call someone fat, that's okay. i will admit to sometimes being judgmental when meeting someone for the first time who is obese. however, i have fat friends and i have skinny friends… and, as one of my fat chick friends says, "I may be fat, but you're ugly and I can diet."

12
Vote -1 Vote +1quirkyblogger January 14, 2009 at 8:45 am

I was drinking a soda and surfing the 'tubes. Shit. Hoisted by my own friggin' petard.

13
Vote -1 Vote +1quirkyblogger January 14, 2009 at 8:55 am

I'll be honest – it was absolutely your post. If this chick is a douchebag, then let her be a douchebag on the merits of her douchebaggery. Her weight has nothing to do with it. If she isn't a douchebag but just overweight, then why give her an FU over the size and/or shape of her body?

I'll be honest, dude – I don't get the judging by appearance thing at all, first impression or last impression. I don't judge bleached blondes or bottle brunettes, thin chicks or fat chicks, slobs or fashionistas.

But maybe that's because I've been heavy for a long time, and I know that people who write me off because my body's not shaped the way society says is beautiful are missing out on someone who is absolutely fucking fabulous. I don't want to take the chance of missing out on someone awesome just because they don't look like some ideal in my head.

14
Vote -1 Vote +1matteroffactmom January 14, 2009 at 9:02 am

noted. and sorry… don't mind me, i'm just sitting here with a big fucking omelet cooking on my face…

15
Vote -1 Vote +1quirkyblogger January 14, 2009 at 9:29 am

It's just food for thought. Don't worry about it.

16
Vote -1 Vote +1Lindsey January 14, 2009 at 11:18 am

Hmm, I admit to some stereotyping there. There ARE skinny people who are great fun also, of course. It just seems that lately EVERYBODY thinks and talks of nothing but appearance, and to me (a girl whose wardrobe was new in '96), that blows. And that's what you meant, right?

17
Vote -1 Vote +1Lindsey January 14, 2009 at 11:27 am

Ohmygosh, ohmygosh, just when I thought you were nearly perfect, you use "hoisted by my own petard"!! I say that all the time and no one knows what the blue hell I'm talking about! Sigh. I love you, Steph, I really do.

18
Vote -1 Vote +1quirkyblogger January 15, 2009 at 3:17 am

Sure. I love me some skinny chicks, too.

And OMG, I'm so feeling you on the wardrobe thing. Newest shit in my closet? Quirkyblogger.com t-shirts. No, seriously.

19
Vote -1 Vote +1quirkyblogger January 15, 2009 at 3:18 am

You can totally count on me for the wicked awesome but totally obcure to 99% of the population, my friend.

Also? My doctor LOL'd for real when I called Bill pally today. I wished you were there. :tear:

20
Vote -1 Vote +1Cheri@BlogThisMom! January 15, 2009 at 3:50 am

You know where I am on this subject.

Same as you.

You know that, right?

21
Vote -1 Vote +1Harmony January 15, 2009 at 4:28 am

I am a fat chick too. I agree, that judging others by their appearances (no matter what they are) to soley determine how you feel about them is wrong…but when the person is an asshat, I can also see comedic value in using them to describe someone. BUT…I am an equal opportunity mud slinger…I think everyone and everything is fair game, and that in the long run we should all expect to be laughed at about something we generally do not like about ourselves.

I will also add, as I see it very important for you to know…that I spent my childhood learning humility from my parents…SO you see, I have always laughed at myself for my flaws…somehow that doesn't seem so important now, oh well.

Kudos to you for speaking your mind!

22
Vote -1 Vote +1quirkyblogger January 15, 2009 at 2:41 pm

I do know this. And thanks.

23
Vote -1 Vote +1quirkyblogger January 15, 2009 at 2:47 pm

I disagree. And don't get me wrong – I can and do laugh at myself. I very rarely take myself even a tiny bit seriously.

On this particular subject, though, I think people who take potshots at other people's appearances are doing so because they feel insecure about themselves. That's why I've done it anyway. And there's nothing funny about ragging on someone else's appearance so you can feel better about your own.

24
Vote -1 Vote +1Harmony January 15, 2009 at 3:22 pm

I definitely do not condone taking potshots at someone else's appearance so that one can feel better about their own…I have no idea why anyone would want to do that, and believe that people who DO, do that are generally bitter.friendless.jerks. However I still laugh my ass off when appearances/personality traits are used in a humorous context….perhaps there is a special formula in which it can be delivered that can make it both humorous and acceptable? Or am I just a big o' asshole?

25
Vote -1 Vote +1Lindsey January 15, 2009 at 3:33 pm

Pally! HA! Yup, one of my favorites.

26
Vote -1 Vote +1quirkyblogger January 15, 2009 at 3:33 pm

Personality traits are totally different, IMO. For example, I think it's HILARIOUS when people call me out on being a drama queen. Because I can be. It's a Leo thing.

But appearance? I just don't ever think that's all that funny. While I fully admit I look like a barrel with toothpicks for arms and legs, it wouldn't be funny for someone else to describe me that way, IMO.

I don't think you're an asshole – it's just a matter of what different people find funny. For me, jokes about someone's appearance seem mean rather than funny.

27
Vote -1 Vote +1San Diego Momma January 15, 2009 at 6:20 pm

I really love that you were honest about how you feel, despite your friendship with MOFM. I love you both and I am happy you have the kind of bloggy relationship where you can air issues and then move on, staying friends.

As someone whose dad made fun of everybody (fat, skinny, you name it), I try to be more tolerant, but sometimes I fall on my face.

I remember my friend and I sitting at a bar once and making fun of people (for their big hair) across from us….then the Big Hairs starting whispering about us and my friend said, "What could they possibly be saying about us?" It was definitely a lesson in nobody's perfect.

Also? I don't even know what I'm saying or how that stupid story relates to your post. But I'm jumbled and nonsensical today.

Love you,
Deb

28
Vote -1 Vote +1quirkyblogger January 15, 2009 at 6:49 pm

I fall down, too. And I fully expect that when I do, one of y'all will call my ass out on the hypocrisy of it all. :grin:

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