…’cause a Stepford party don’t stop.

Ah, my loverlies…the fun never ends in Stepford. There is *always a sales party to attend. Always. My Pampered Chef party was supposed to be on Friday, but…well…yeah. Things happen. So, we sort of bagged that plan and went out and had Mexican food instead. Probably not so good for my sales numbers, but super-fabulous-awesome for my morale. And in the grand scheme of things, morale has to come before racking up some hostess earnings towards more Pampered Chef stuff I don’t really need. (Except I totally need everything I’ve ever gotten from them, Bill. Really. And don’t let’s talk about the mini-muffin pan right now.)

Today was Carmen’s Tastefully Simple party. I love Carmen, so I was all booty-hurt that I didn’t get invited. I might have even sniffled about it to Sarah when she informed me that I had to go with her because…well…because I had to, that’s all.

So, we go. Now, look, y’all know that I’m not really into the whole cooking gig. Tastefully Simple should be right up my alley, and aside from the pricing, it would be. BUT that pricing is a big hangup for me. $5 for a beer bread mix?! And you still have to add the beer anyway? No. No. And no. Here’s why — here’s the recipe for beer bread, my pretties.

Now, take note of the ingredients — 2 c. self-rising flour (or 2 c. all-purpose flour + 1 tsp. baking powder + 1 tsp. salt), 1 c. sugar, 1 bottle of beer and some butter to coat the pan then to pour on top of the finished bread. Now, when you buy the TS mix, you’re getting everything except the beer and the butter. So, you’re paying $5 for 2 cups of flour and a cup of sugar. COME. ON. How does that make sense?!? I mean, we all know that I’m no Frugal McDougal here, and even I have to shake my head at that.

And don’t hand me any crap about how “convenient” it is, either. Dumping a coupla cups of flour and a cup of sugar into a bowl is no harder than dumping that mix in, for the love of Mike. But, yet again, I digress.

So, we show up to the party, and I’m sort of feeling bizarre about going since I wasn’t, after all, invited. Sarah’s invitation said she could bring a guest, but yeah…awkward if Carmen didn’t actually want me there in the first place; right? I ignore my instincts about this because it’s Sarah, and I love that broad like whoa.

Anyway, Carmen answers the door, and she seems genuinely happy to see me. “STEPHANIE! I’m so glad Sarah told you! I’m so glad you came!” and yaddayaddayadda. Which leaves me all confuzzled…the perfect state for any sales consultant who feeds me and laughs at my jokes to make a sale. Oh hell.

So, we sit through the party. The consultant was nice enough, and she fed us some pretty good stuff. Crap. I knew I shouldn’t have brought my purse. I also knew Sarah was a big liar, liar, plants for hire when she said we’d only stay half an hour. The hag. Hee. Oh, and the consultant also tried to feed us something so foul that Carmen’s sister actually got up and spit it out. Hee again. God, I love Stepford.

So, the sales part is over, and we’re doing the normal Stepford thing, and Carmen tells me again that she’s really glad I came, and I was all, “Well I almost didn’t what with being not invited and all.” With a big grin, of course, ’cause I believe Carmen likes me. She whips out an invitation with my name on it and says, “You were invited, but I couldn’t remember if your house was [my house #] or [neighbor's house #] and Sarah was supposed to tell you!” DOH! And YAY!

And tomorrow is yet another Pampered Chef party which I’ve been informed I will be attending. And probably I will. I will not, however, be buying anything as I still have my own party to buy stuff from. If anyone out there missed the last PC party Sarah and I had and would like to order stuff from this one, just e-mail me, and we’ll work something out. No pressure, kids, except that the more junk that gets bought from my party, the more free junk I get. Just sayin’. :grin:

Woo. I better get to bed. This whirlwind social life of mine has me worn out. Also, probably I should go make nice with Bill so he won’t spaz out when he finds out I bought more crap from a sales party. DOH!