Nicole. We have to talk. Ok. That first picture, you were hot. I’m not a huge fan of the dress or the hair, but even so, you looked *good, girl. You looked *healthy. You were dead sexy. (Ok, maybe that’s a bit much ’cause that dress has a few issues.) Then you stopped eating. Honey, look, I know it’s not cheap to unfug oneself. But please, don’t even *try to tell me your dad couldn’t afford to feed *and clothe you. He’s Lionel effin’ Richie. And as much as you spent on that second dress? Still fugly, but *only because it doesn’t fit. With your previous figure, that dress would’ve been *hot. (Ok, still not loving the drape pull straps, but whatever.) You would have *rocked that red carpet. Instead, you made America want to feed you a biscuit. With sausage gravy. Repeatedly.
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