Nick Lachey Requests Spousal Support

Oh, Nick. :sigh: Do you *really want to do this? SPOUSAL SUPPORT? Getting half of the marital assets just isn’t going to cut it for you? Jeez. Nick, you realize this is so *not sexy, right? And maybe more importantly, this isn’t *manly. You’re trying to have a career in sportscasting. No guy is going to take you seriously when you’re getting *alimony, for goodness’ sake. And the girls who might’ve bought your record are going to rethink it now. ‘Cause chicks just can’t dig a dude who’s sponging off his ex-wife.

And really, Nick, this isn’t going to make Jess rethink the divorce. And it’s not going to hurt her feelings, either. She’s not going to cry about writing you a check every month; she’s going to be pissed at you. And probably think to herself what a freakin’ *pussy you are.

Just think it over, ok?

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